The Beauty Of Sadness And Longing

There is a beautiful kind of sadness -- one most peo

ple think they shouldn't feel, that should be endured and welcomed at least, if not celebrated.

This Sadness is transcendent, it is not merely the feeling of absence, but in reality is the presence of the awareness of the longing for the one you love.

It would be easy to conclude that this feeling is a sign of disconnection from joy, an unfortunate happening that would make an easy target for well-meaning givers of advice to quote from their favorite scripture, and act as if they know it all.

But here I'm not talking about a different form of sadness. I am talking about another kind -- a holy melancholy that sculpts, deepens, and refines from within.

Like the dusk that follows day, it is not deprived of light, but only another shade of light. It is darker, yes, but isn't it the darkness that allows the stars to shine?

If the night never came how would we be able to enjoy the colors of the day, if the season of fall disappeared, who would value the blooms of spring.

When we are in presence of our beloved, we feel so many different emotions, love, joy, humor.

But when the Beloved departs an uncomfortable feeling sometimes rises.

It Feels as if the moon is full, but the night is empty – as if you are thirsty for something and there is nothing that can fill you again, and the the only thing left to drink now is a bucket of tears and you cannot find the handle.

Then somewhere off in the distance you hear the sound of cello. Is it sad or beautiful? In That moment you know that it is beautifully sad.

The One for whom you breathe has taken his leave and is playing hide and seek. Drawn by the music of this sweet sadness, you follow, feeling your way like a blind man, singing quiet songs of praise and wondering if what you hear is the sound of your own voice or your name being called.

You know, and have always known, that the Beloved has left the world behind as a gift. But you do not want the gift. You want the Giver.

In your quest to make that sadness go away, you also throw the gift that your beloved left behind.

You give up on the things that s/he wanted for you; things that would have made him happy.

Instead of savoring the longing and the love that he left behind, you just let everything go, in hope of the return of someone who will never come back.